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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30091860">sleep on it</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/morebees/pseuds/morebees'>morebees</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ambiguous/Open Ending, As One Does, Canon Compliant, Confusion, Drunken Kissing, Feelings Realization, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Literal Sleeping Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Sleeping Together, Vomiting, beomgyu really likes sleeping with yeonjun and then :0 develops a crush, four + one type of story, kinda? i make it pretty obvious these idiots are in love, lol at the order of these tags, projecting my love of yeonjun's hair as a form of love language, this is basically just four times they sleep together and then the last time bg confesses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 21:42:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,571</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30091860</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/morebees/pseuds/morebees</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It becomes a regular occurrence after that. Neither of them talks about it, but Yeonjun doesn’t even blink an eye when he sees two feet walking up to his door. Sometimes it’s before Yeonjun has fallen asleep, sometimes it’s in the early hours of the morning, but Yeonjun never says no to Beomgyu coming to sleep with him. </p><p>-</p><p>four times beomgyu comes into yeonjun's room to sleep with him + one more time where he finally finds the courage and confesses</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Beomgyu/Choi Yeonjun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>146</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>sleep on it</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i'm kinda unfamiliar with the dynamic between these two boys so sorry if this is all over the place but i just Love writing scenes where people are sleepy</p><p>tw for one quick vomiting scene, some brief swearing, and alcohol mention</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>one. </b>
</p><p>The first time Beomgyu does it, he doesn’t even really think much of it. He just can’t sleep. After what feels like hours and hours of tossing and turning, he gives up. His pillow and blankets are hot, and his face is hot, and his whole body is hot. So, he slips down the bunk bed ladder, making sure not to wake Soobin on the way down, and steps into the hallway with a deep breath. </p><p>He leans up against the wall, breathing in and out, nice and slow. His head feels foggy, and his skin is still burning. He’s <i>so</i> tired. He had gone to bed two hours ago and hadn’t managed to keep his eyes shut for more than thirty seconds. </p><p>Beomgyu trudges down the hallway, rubbing both of his eyes. He’s not really thinking; he’s more just letting his feet carry him through their dark dorm. He pads past the kitchen, and before he can stop himself, his hand is around the doorknob, and he steps into Yeonjun’s room without a sound. </p><p>It’s stupid; he’s being stupid right now, Beomgyu knows. Thinking that he can just walk in here unannounced and curl up beside the oldest boy. But at the same time, he knows out of everyone Yeonjun will be the least mad to get awoken by Beomgyu at three in the morning. </p><p>Yeonjun’s room is almost pitch black, just a few lines of light coming in through his curtains. Beomgyu can make out the lump of Yeonjun’s body on his body, curled up in the fetal position. </p><p>Beomgyu side steps into one of Yeonjun’s shelves, causing an unidentified object to tip over with a small smack. Beomgyu is too tired to pick it back up and stops walking as the elder boy stirs, rolling over.</p><p>“Gyu?” Yeonjun’s voice comes out hoarse, and Beomgyu sees him rub his eyes in confusion. </p><p>Beomgyu makes his way over to Yeonjun and sits down cross-legged pressed up against the side of Yeonjun’s bed. He rests his chin on his arms, which are crossed on the edge of Yeonjun’s mattress.</p><p>Their faces are centimetres apart. Only one of Yeonjun’s eyes is open, and he’s squinting, still trying to assess the situation. </p><p>“Can’t sleep hyung,” Beomgyu supplies, mumbling into his arm. </p><p>Yeonjun lets out a breathy laugh, and even in the dim lighting, Beomgyu can see him rolling his eyes. Yeonjun rolls onto his back, his arms extended out from both of his sides. His right arm finds the back of Beomgyu’s head, scratching at the younger boy’s scalp instinctively. </p><p>“What do you want me to do about it?” Yeonjun asks, his voice low. Beomgyu can’t believe he’s not getting told off right now. Yeonjun doesn’t seem bothered at all that Beomgyu has just barged in and interrupted his sleep. There’s a jolt in his stomach when Yeonjun’s hand stops moving and holds the back of Beomgyu’s neck, like he’s paused, waiting for Beomgyu’s response. </p><p>“Hmm, don’t know,” Beomgyu says. His answer is childish, but he’s too tired to fully form a proper thought right now. Yeonjun turns his head to look at him, eyes wide. He studies Beomgyu for a moment before retracting his hand and tugging his blankets up, out from under Beomgyu’s arms. Beomgyu grins, looking at Yeonjun’s unreadable expression. Yeonjun looks at him expectantly, so Beomgyu gets up and slowly crawls into bed beside the elder boy. </p><p>Yeonjun’s still on his back, and Beomgyu lies on his stomach, resting his elbows on Yeonjun’s chest. Yeonjun manages to pull the blanket up over Beomgyu, resting the edge on Beomgyu’s shoulders. </p><p>Beomgyu sighs, looking at Yeonjun before flopping down and wrapping his arms around Yeonjun’s core, his cheek pressed to Yeonjun’s chest. Yeonjun lets out a short laugh, vibrating Beomgyu’s body.</p><p>“Do you think you’ll be able to get to sleep now?” Yeonjun asks. His voice isn’t teasing, he’s being genuine. Beomgyu feels his cheeks warm.</p><p>“Mmmhmm. Thanks, hyung,” he whispers, snuggling closer to Yeonjun. He feels the elder boy shift for a few moments before settling into Beomgyu’s embrace. </p><p>Beomgyu closes his eyes and listens to Yeonjun’s heartbeat steady. He actually feels capable of falling asleep now. But he doesn’t want to jinx anything, so he just closes his eyes and matches his breathing with Yeonjun’s before eventually drifting off. </p><p>-</p><p>Beomgyu is awoken by someone, re Yeonjun, wiggling under him. Beomgyu cracks an eye open, assessing the situation. </p><p>“Beomgyu, Beomgyu, Beomgyu.” Yeonjun is whispering to him, gently shaking Beomgyu’s shoulders. The younger boy is still pressed to Yeonjun’s chest, his arms still around Yeonjun. Beomgyu can’t believe neither of them moved around during the night. He also can’t believe how great of a sleep he had last night. He knocked out after only a few minutes of lying with Yeonjun. </p><p>Finally, Beomgyu shifts, lifting himself up and shifting to lie beside Yeonjun instead of on top of him. </p><p>“Yah, finally, I can breathe,” Yeonjun teases, turning to give Beomgyu a big smile. Beomgyu, still in the process of waking up, can only scrunch his face up then burrow it into the edge of Yeonjun’s pillow. </p><p>“Okay, okay, it’s time to get up. Let’s go, let’s go,” Yeonjun prompts, sitting up and slapping Beomgyu’s back gently. </p><p>The two of them don’t talk about it. Beomgyu slides out of Yeonjun’s bed and returns to his own room, fetching his things before going off to shower. Neither of them questions it, and Beomgyu feels like Yeonjun just gets it – he just gets him. He understands sometimes Beomgyu just needs someone to help him out, no questions asked. </p><p>Although, the more Beomgyu thinks about it, the more he wonders if they <i>should</i> talk about it. He wants to thank Yeonjun or ask him if that was okay, because in all honestly, he wants to do it again. </p><p>Yeonjun is just so gentle and warm and nothing against his and Soobin’s bunkbed, but Yeonjun’s room is just so nice. But Beomgyu tries not to think about that as days go by, and he adapts back to his own bed, trying to convince himself it was just a one-time thing. </p><p>He hopes it isn’t just a one-time thing, though. </p><p>
  <b>two. </b>
</p><p>The second time comes a few weeks later, and it’s not nearly as fun. Beomgyu goes to bed early because he has a headache, and his whole body aches from their dance rehearsal they had that seemed to drag on for hours and hours. But most importantly, he feels really anxious. Which sucks. Because they have a really important schedule tomorrow, lots of interviews, lots of smiling and answering questions, so Beomgyu needs to be well-rested.</p><p>Except it’s one in the morning, and his heart is hammering in his chest, and his palms are sweaty, and he can’t stop jiggling his legs under his blanket. </p><p>He and Soobin watched a movie together; before saying goodnight, Soobin reminded him that ‘Everything will be fine tomorrow! Please try not to worry about it too much!” before knocking out. And Beomgyu is trying, he really is, but it’s no use. His brain is spiralling. </p><p>He shakily makes his way down the ladder, shivering when his bare feet hit the floor. As soon as he’s out the door, he doesn’t waste any time making it to Yeonjun’s room. He awkwardly hits the door, trying to knock softly, but it’s more of a direct hit, and he winces as his knuckles sting against the wood. He hears Yeonjun hum from inside, and he cracks the door open, poking his head in first.</p><p>Yeonjun is sitting up in bed, leaning up against his headboard, on his phone. He has his bedside lamp on, so the room is illuminated, a soft yellow glow cast around the room. Beomgyu takes one look at Yeonjun, and his face crumbles. </p><p>Yeonjun lets out an ‘<i>aww</i> ’ and opens his arms, beckoning Beomgyu forward. The younger boy stumbles forward, making sure to close the door before crawling under the covers, wrapping his arms around Yeonjun’s torso. His body feels numb as he rubs his cheek against Yeonjun’s arm. </p><p>He doesn’t hear Yeonjun the first time he asks him what’s wrong, and it’s not until Yeonjun nudges him with his elbow that Beomgyu snaps out of his haze and blinks a few times before he answers. </p><p>“I feel like my chest is going to explode, hyung,” he says quietly. Yeonjun immediately shifts, pulling his arm out from where Beomgyu’s leaning on it, so he falls into Yeonjun’s chest, and Yeonjun wraps his arm around him, pulling Beomgyu closer. </p><p>“Beomgyu-ah, that’s no good,” Yeonjun says sorrowfully, rubbing soft circles into Beomgyu’s shoulder. </p><p>Beomgyu can only nod in agreeance, but Yeonjun’s right. It’s really not good. His body tends to numb up when he gets really anxious, which, again, sucks. </p><p>“I can’t stop thinking about tomorrow,” Beomgyu explains, trying not to sound too pitiful. Yeonjun hums, thinking. He places his phone on his bedside table, expertly managing to plug it in with one hand and shuffles down further, so the two of them are basically lying flat on the bed. Yeonjun’s head is slightly propped up on his pillow, though, but Beomgyu’s still leaning into his chest. </p><p>“Well, I think it would be pretty nice if you <i>stopped</i> thinking about tomorrow. Tomorrow is completely uncertain. None of us know how it will go, and there’s nothing we can do about it. I’m sure you’ve already dwelled on all the terrible, horrible things that could happen, but I’m here to remind you that none of that is going to happen. I promise. And if they do, we’ll be there for you. Okay?” Yeonjun says softly. </p><p>Beomgyu feels like he’s going to cry. He seriously has no idea what he did to deserve such kind bandmates who sometimes know him even better than he knows himself. He nods, dragging his chin against Yeonjun’s soft sweater. </p><p>“You can stay here with me tonight, if you want,” Yeonjun suggests, his voice barely audible. </p><p>“Yes please,” Beomgyu whispers, earning a soft laugh from Yeonjun. </p><p>Yeonjun asks Beomgyu if he wants to talk more about his anxiety, but Beomgyu shakes his head. Truthfully, he’s getting sleepy, and his body is crashing from using up so much energy from worrying. But, being wrapped up in Yeonjun’s embrace makes him feel so comforted and safe he’s sure he could never feel sad again. </p><p>Beomgyu wiggles over until he’s lying flat on Yeonjun’s mattress, pulling one of the many pillows Yeonjun has stacked on his bed. Yeonjun sits up a bit more, so Beomgyu’s face is right next to Yeonjun’s thigh, but he doesn’t mind. He rolls over, pushing his spin into the side of Yeonjun’s leg. The physical contact calms Beomgyu down, reminding him he’s not alone. </p><p>Yeonjun hums absentmindedly, carding his hand through Beomgyu’s hair. Beomgyu closes his eyes and realizes his heart has stopped hammering. It’s all going to be okay. He’s going to be okay.</p><p>
  <b>three. </b>
</p><p>It becomes a regular occurrence after that. Neither of them talks about it, but Yeonjun doesn’t even blink an eye when he sees two feet walking up to his door. Sometimes it’s before Yeonjun has fallen asleep, sometimes it’s in the early hours of the morning, but Yeonjun never says no to Beomgyu coming to sleep with him. </p><p>And Beomgyu really <i>really</i> appreciates it. Because through their busy schedules he gets more stressed and needs more and more of someone to just be there for him. Just to have someone in the same bed as him, just to feel someone beside him, makes him feel so much better. </p><p>So, by now, they’re both used to it – Beomgyu entering into Yeonjun’s space when he needs him. Yeonjun never comes to Beomgyu and Soobin’s room because a) bunkbeds and b) they both know waking up Soobin wouldn’t go over well. Plus, Beomgyu likes to be in a space that’s just them. </p><p>He’s also (stupidly) mulled over the fact that Yeonjun doesn’t need him, and that’s why he never visits Beomgyu. It’s always Beomgyu reaching out and Beomgyu making the first step, never the other way around. He’s half-convinced Yeonjun is putting up with him because he’s the oldest and feels the responsibility to do so, and half because he knows how much it’ll hurt if he says no to Beomgyu.</p><p>And so Beomgyu is shocked when one night, Yeonjun latches himself to Beomgyu’s arm and starts pulling him towards his bedroom. All five of them are drunk and Beomgyu feels a little stupid because this wasn’t at all how the night was supposed to go.</p><p>Since Taehyun and Hueningkai turned 19, they talked about having a celebratory drink in the dorm together. They were all only supposed to have had a few drinks each, but Yeonjun accidentally (?) bought way too much soju for five people, and even though he assured them they could just keep the extra bottles for another time, they managed to finish all of it.</p><p>After an extremely competitive game of karaoke, the five of them agreed it was time to go to bed. But now Beomgyu’s head is spinning, and he really wants to lie down. So, he doesn’t mind when Yeonjun wordlessly grabs his hand pulls him forward towards his room, mumbling about feeling sleepy. </p><p>“Goodnight Beomgyu-ah.”</p><p>Beomgyu turns and sees Soobin folding the blankets from the living room. His hair is sticking up, and his cheeks are rosy, and Beomgyu gives him a big smile. </p><p>“Goodnight hyung.” </p><p>Beomgyu and Yeonjun have stopped walking, but Yeonjun waits only a moment before tugging at Beomgyu’s hand, urging him to keep walking. Soobin gives Beomgyu a <i>look</i>. Beomgyu narrows his eyes, trying to ask Soobin telepathically what exactly he’s trying to say. But Soobin just gives him a coy smile and ducks his head. </p><p>“C’mon Gyu,” Yeonjun mumbles, tugging Beomgyu’s hand harder. Beomgyu sighs and turns back around, eyeing Yeonjun. He doesn’t know what the older boy is up to, but he doesn’t really care. He’s too drunk. </p><p>They stumble into Yeonjun’s room, and Beomgyu leans up against the back of Yeonjun’s door, taking a deep breath. The room is kind of spinning, but he doesn’t mind that much. </p><p>Yeonjun’s room is dark. His curtains are only half-closed, so there’s a few streaks of light cutting through the walls, but other than that, everything is washed in shades of dark greys and blacks. </p><p>Yeonjun is plugging his phone in, swaying back and forth as he bends down, then stands back up again. Beomgyu lets a giggle slip out, amused at the fact that he’s finding everything so funny. He knows Yeonjun has had more to drink than him and that he’s a lot drunker than him, but he doesn’t mind. He’ll take care of Yeonjun if he wants him to. </p><p>Beomgyu wants to slide his hands into his back pant pockets, but he’s just wearing shorts and a baggy t-shirt, his entire outfit pocketless. So instead, he slips his arms behind him, holding his own hands for something to do.</p><p>Yeonjun straightens up and turns to look at Beomgyu. The elder boy is bleary-eyed, and his hair is a bit messy, but his cheeks are so rosy (well, Beomgyu can’t make that out in the low light, but he remembers the detail from when he was staring at Yeonjun in the living room) and he has this small smile on his face, so Beomgyu knows he’s content. </p><p>And Beomgyu can’t stop himself from smiling. He can’t believe how <i>happy</i> the alcohol made him. He’s really glad they had this night and that he’s here with Yeonjun and feels like this and that they can just have a break sometimes. Because everything feels heavy and rushed and scary sometimes. But nights like these make Beomgyu feel so relaxed and appreciative of his members. </p><p>The room has been quiet for too long now, and Beomgyu can feel Yeonjun’s eyes boring into him, but he refuses to make eye contact. His eyes are instead trailing all around Yeonjun’s room, picking up every detail he can make out in the dark. </p><p>He doesn’t know why but there’s definitely some sort of tension between them. And as the seconds pass, where neither of them says anything, it grows bigger, making Beomgyu’s head fill with unsaid thoughts.</p><p>Finally, his eyes flick over to Yeonjun, and <i>oh</i>, there’s that lurch in this stomach that he’s begun to grow so accustomed to whenever he looks at Yeonjun. </p><p>And then Beomgyu sort of? Maybe? Blacks out? Or at least the alcohol really takes hold of him, and he knows it’s from the two shots he did with Hueningkai right before heading off to bed that are hitting him extra hard. </p><p>Everything’s coming in flashes to him, from Yeonjun pulling him into bed, to his cheeks burning from the alcohol, to them giggling in bed over nothing. The room is stuffy, and Yeonjun cracks his window open just a bit, the sounds of the city bleeding into his room. </p><p>Beomgyu can feel that his cheeks are red hot, and he knows he’s trying to convince himself it’s entirely because of the drinks and not because of how Yeonjun is being right now. Which is just Yeonjun being his regular self, but drunk Beomgyu is so enamoured by it he’s trying to sober up in a matter of seconds before he does something stupid. </p><p>Except he does something extremely stupid when Yeonjun pulls Beomgyu on top of him and looks at him with half-lidded eyes, and all Beomgyu can hear is the distant traffic of Seoul when he leans in to kiss the older boy. </p><p>He stops, though, their lips centimetres apart and takes a breath in, feeling lightheaded. It’s Yeonjun who connects their lips with a swift tilt of his neck. Yeonjun tastes like soju, and Beomgyu’s head is spinning, but he doesn’t care because, with the jolt from his stomach, he realizes how long he’s wanted this to happen. </p><p>He also realizes a second too late that his hand is travelling up, under Yeonjun’s t-shirt, grabbing at his bare skin, and Yeonjun is deepening the kiss, and suddenly they’re both so <i>desperate</i>. And Beomgyu thinks he’s going to forget how to breathe because this is all so much, but he feels so good and kissing Yeonjun feels so nice and natural and normal.</p><p>But he’s drunk. </p><p>They’re both drunk.</p><p>The sense that’s knocked into Beomgyu’s head takes him out of the situation for a moment, and he’s brought back when a siren interrupts the soft night air. Yeonjun has taken Beomgyu’s chin with his thumb and index finger, tugging him closer for another kiss. </p><p>“Hyung.” Beomgyu’s voice is breathy, and he should be embarrassed when they break apart, but it’s too late for that. He can’t believe this is happening, and his hands are pushing up Yeonjun’s shirt, and neither of them is stopping, and now Beomgyu’s brain is all muddled because where exactly was this going to go? And why exactly did this start in the first place?</p><p>“You’re so pretty,” Yeonjun whispers, pushing back Beomgyu’s bangs with his palm. </p><p>Beomgyu doesn’t really react; he just stares back at Yeonjun, silently asking him, <i>What exactly are we doing here?</i> But he’s too scared to say it out loud. </p><p>And suddenly, his stomach lurches, but it’s for a completely different reason and holy shit holy shit holy shit. </p><p>“I’m gonna-” Beomgyu can’t even finish his sentence because he really is going to throw up in Yeonjun’s room unless he doesn’t make it out to the bathroom in the next few moments. </p><p>He doesn’t make it to the bathroom, but he does make it to the garbage bin in the hallway by the living room. And suddenly Beomgyu feels awful. The post alcohol headache is settling in, and his stomach hurts, and he feels gross, and what he’s feeling now is just so out of his element Beomgyu kind of just wants to lie on the floor and cry. </p><p>Thankfully, the trash had a plastic bag lining in it, so Beomgyu disposed of it quickly and hurries to the bathroom to drink several glasses of water and to brush his teeth. </p><p>Looking at himself in the bathroom mirror, in the harsh bathroom lighting, he has to laugh at himself. His cheeks are <i>so</i> red, and his hair is all messy, but he looks happy. Minus the sting in his throat from the puke, he is happy. The bad mood that had swooped over him moments ago is gone. His fingers run over his lips, remembering what Yeonjun’s mouth felt like against his.</p><p>In the daze, Beomgyu manages to drink what, to him, feels like is five litres of water and feels much better. He’s in the middle of brushing his teeth when he hears the soft footsteps of Yeonjun making his way over to him. </p><p>He’s not expecting the worst, but when Yeonjun’s eyes catch Beomgyu’s in the mirror, the younger boy relives an entire wave of emotions crashing over him. And <i>oh no</i> Beomgyu realizes, he’s really in deep. But he’s drunk – really drunk, he reminds himself. This is probably just drunk Beomgyu thinking. </p><p>Yeonjun leans against the door frame, crossing his arms. He looks tired, but his cheeks are flushed, so it’s a weird combination of him looking extremely awake but also extremely low energy.</p><p>“Was the kiss that bad?” Yeonjun asks, his voice deep with sleepiness. </p><p>Beomgyu snorts and kicks his leg out, his socked foot hitting Yeonjun’s bare shin. It’s a stupid reaction, but it’s the instantaneous one Beomgyu’s brain thinks is appropriate for the current situation. Plus, his toothbrush is in his mouth, so he can’t exactly say anything. </p><p>Beomgyu spits into the sink, taking a final gulp of water and wiping his face before straightening up and facing Yeonjun. He feels slightly trapped because Yeonjun is blocking his only exit, but he reminds himself he has absolutely no reason to feel anxious right now. </p><p>Well. They did kiss—a lot. </p><p>“Okay, it’s your bedtime,” Yeonjun teases, looking Beomgyu up and down, “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, okay?”</p><p>A noise comes out of Beomgyu’s throat before he can stop it – a sort of strangled objection to the fact that Yeonjun is just leaving him here, in their horribly bright bathroom, drunk at two in the morning by himself. </p><p>Yeonjun looks up in surprise, and now it’s Beomgyu’s turn to cross his arms and give Yeonjun a stare. </p><p>“Hyung, we should talk about…” Beomgyu says slowly, managing to keep eye contact with Yeonjun. </p><p>Yeonjun doesn’t look embarrassed, maybe a little surprised, but he doesn’t say anything for a while. He just keeps looking at Beomgyu, and the younger boy starts to wonder what exactly is going on in his brain for him not to be saying anything for this long. </p><p>“Yah,” Yeonjun’s voice falters for a moment, but both of them pretend not to hear it. “Can we talk about it in the morning? I’m really,” Yeonjun gestures vaguely to his head, twisting his hand back and forth quickly, “I need to talk about this sober, okay? I don’t want to say anything stupid.”</p><p>“Right,” Beomgyu says back, his voice weaker than he wanted it to sound. He’s not upset, he’s just. He doesn’t really know, he’s very confused for one. And he’s wishing this whole thing could be solved so much easier than it’s going to be to talk about. </p><p>“Okay. Good. Goodnight,” Yeonjun’s voice is soft and kind and Beomgyu wants to cry.</p><p>“Goodnight YJ,” he whispers before putting his face in his hands and rubbing his eyes. He stifles a laugh and looks up when he hears a giggle come from Yeonjun. </p><p>“Goodnight BG,” he says, giving him a full tooth smile. Although Beomgyu knows this is just a drunk Yeonjun smile, and he’s not genuinely that happy. He doubts any part of this conversation is making Yeonjun happy. </p><p>“Don’t worry, okay,” Yeonjun reassures him before taking a step backwards and running a hand through his hair. He does a little wave to Beomgyu before he turns away, heading towards his room.</p><p>Beomgyu is left in the bathroom alone. He’s not upset, but at the same time, he feels low; he feels like a weight is sagging down on him. He finishes up in the bathroom and enters his and Soobin’s room quietly. </p><p>Soobin has so kindly left out a water bottle and pills for Beomgyu in the morning, and he smiles lovingly at the sleeping Soobin, hoping his hangover isn’t also as terrible as Beomgyu’s is going to be. </p><p>Falling asleep drunk isn’t one of Beomgyu’s favourite activities in the world, but he’s glad he’s not sober tonight. His thoughts would be completely spiralling if he didn’t have any alcohol in his system. For now, he’s reassuring himself that everything will be fine and based on Yeonjun’s reaction (he doesn’t want to jinx anything just yet!), he thinks that maybe, just maybe, they have a shot. </p><p>He curls into his mattress, closing his eyes and hoping the room will stop spinning soon. He knows kissing Yeonjun wasn’t a mistake, so he just wants to stop feeling like it was. </p><p>
  <b>four. </b>
</p><p>The next time Beomgyu wants to sleep with Yeonjun, it’s awkward. Or at least Beomgyu feels awkward walking up to Yeonjun’s door and not knowing if he should knock, or just enter, or turn around and go back to bed. He should be going back to bed, it’s way too late for him to be interrupting his sleep, but he woke up after a bad dream and now feels a little shaken.</p><p>He first tried Soobin, but he kept pushing Beomgyu away, mumbling something about giving the leader some space and that he just needed to go back to bed. But Beomgyu knows he needs the comfort of someone else now, and if Soobin’s off the list, he knows Yeonjun is next in line. </p><p>So Beomgyu settles on knocking softly, waiting a moment, and then slowly opening the door, stepping in without making a sound. Yeonjun’s room is pitch black, and Beomgyu can just see from the light in the hallway that Yeonjun curled up in bed fast asleep. He doesn’t stir when Beomgyu closes the door and presses his back to it, taking a moment to orient himself.</p><p>Reality hits him pretty hard, and he instantly wants to do a 180 and exit the room as quickly as possible, but then he remembers why he came here in the first place. He can’t sleep. If he goes back to his room, he definitely won’t be able to sleep. So at least he’ll try. </p><p>Even if it’s a little awkward. Because, truthfully, they didn’t talk about their drunk endeavours. The following day they were woken up way too early and shipped off to a schedule and then a rehearsal and then a filming and then and then and then…</p><p>And then it had happened so long Beomgyu felt weird bringing it back up. So, neither of them mentioned it, but neither of them seemed to mind. Or at least that’s how Yeonjun was putting it off as. Things between them weren’t broken or anything, it was just a little weird when it was only the two of them alone together, and cameras weren’t around. Beomgyu felt like he was walking on eggshells and had no idea how to properly bring up the problem at hand. If there truly was some sort of problem. Beomgyu was pretty unsure about that too. </p><p>Beomgyu crosses the room and lifts up the blankets a little, nudging Yeonjun’s back with his knee. It takes Yeonjun a few moments before he shifts, and Beomgyu takes that as permission to join him in the bed. Yeonjun still hasn’t opened his eyes and, by the looks of it, is basically still asleep, but he squirms over, so Beomgyu has space on the bed to curl up against Yeonjun’s chest. </p><p>He goes to move in closer to the older boy when Yeonjun shifts, burrowing <i>his</i> head under Beomgyu’s chin. Beomgyu doesn’t mind, but he stifles a laugh of surprise. He assumes Yeonjun is so sleepy he hasn’t got a clear view of exactly what happening, so he accepts the fact that Yeonjun will be clinging onto him all night. </p><p>Beomgyu yawns and settles into the bed, hoping he’ll drift off to sleep soon. He’s still feeling very awake, but a little less so, now that a clearly sleeping Yeonjun is pressed up against him. Beomgyu reaches up and starts threading his fingers through Yeonjun’s hair as a force of habit, more than anything. Yeonjun’s hair is desperately in need of a redye, the pink has faded, and his roots are clearly growing out. </p><p>But Beomgyu can’t see any of this now and tugs lightly at the strands on the back of Yeonjun’s neck, not really thinking about it. He’s just trying to calm himself down, but Beomgyu feels a slight pinch to his side, and he flinches, letting a laugh escape. </p><p>“Yah!” Beomgyu whisper yells, “What was that for?” </p><p>Yeonjun doesn’t respond for a while, so Beomgyu continues twisting Yeonjun’s hair in between his fingers. He wishes the other boy’s hair was longer. Like how it was in the months before, or when he had the extensions in for <i>WLTS</i>, but Beomgyu still loves how soft it is. When they’re no product in it and hasn’t been freshly bleached, he loves pushing it around, parting Yeonjun’s hair in different directions.</p><p>“Why are you here?” Yeonjun finally asks, so quietly Beomgyu is unsure if he actually heard it or not.</p><p>“I couldn’t sleep,” Beomgyu explains shortly. Yeonjun moves and hums in acknowledgment, his fingers reaching out and closing on the collar of Beomgyu’s t-shirt. </p><p>The younger boy closes his eyes and lets his hand fall limp against the back of Yeonjun’s neck. The sleepiness is finally starting to hit him. After what feels like hours, he’s tired. </p><p>-</p><p>Beomgyu wakes up the next morning in the exact same position he fell asleep in. Yeonjun is surprisingly still asleep, but his alarm is going off. Beomgyu scratches at Yeonjun’s scalp, trying to rouse him, but the older boy is still unmoving. </p><p>He stirs finally when screams from the living room (emanating from Taehyun and Hueningkai, doing what, Beomgyu has absolutely no idea. Why they would be this excited over something so early in the morning, he doesn’t know, but Beomgyu smiles to himself, happy they’re happy) bleed under the door and into Yeonjun’s room. </p><p>Yeonjun blinks a few times, and then his grip on Beomgyu instantly tightens, causing Beomgyu to squirm in discomfort.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” Yeonjun asks bluntly, his mouth hanging open in shock. He sits up a little, propping himself up with his elbow. Beomgyu rolls over onto his back, looking up at Yeonjun’s from his pillow. </p><p>“Did you just get here?” Yeonjun continues, still confused. Beomgyu laughs, his cheeks warming at the look Yeonjun’s giving him.</p><p>“No hyung, I snuck in last night. You talked to me,” Beomgyu pauses, amused, “Do you not remember that?” Beomgyu questions, half teasing, half-serious. Yeonjun rolls his eyes and turns his head away, and suddenly Beomgyu realizes the older boy is embarrassed. He’s embarrassed because this is the first time they’ve slept together since <i>the kiss</i> happened. Beomgyu suddenly doesn’t know what he should be feeling. Should he also be embarrassed? </p><p>Except he’s really, <i>really</i> not. This feels normal, he realizes. This <i>thing</i> between the two of them feels completely normal. </p><p>Yeonjun just shakes his head and buries his face in his hands, scrubbing his face with his palms. There’s a knock at the door, and both boys’ heads shoot up as Taehyun and Hueningkai pop their heads into the room. Taehyun’s eyes instantly narrow at the sight in front of them, and he makes eye contact with Beomgyu, silently delivering him an entire paragraph into his brain. </p><p>Beomgyu gives him a small smile and tries to look away, but Taehyun’s stare is so piercing he can only give him a shrug and a slight wince to try and get the message across. Whatever that message may be. </p><p>“Hyung! We have to leave in twenty minutes,” Hueningkai announces. </p><p>Yeonjun waves him off and runs a hand through his hair, mumbling something about not needing that long to get ready. But Hueningkai frowns, his brown furrowing. </p><p>“I wasn’t talking to youuu,” he points out, and his eyes slide over to Beomgyu. “It’s him we should be worried about. Yeonjun-hyung make sure he doesn’t fall back asleep.” </p><p>Yeonjun lifts his head up, a smirk on his face as he looks over to Beomgyu. Now it’s Beomgyu’s turn to blush, as three pairs of eyes are on him. </p><p>“Yah, I’m up!” Beomgyu exclaims, softly slapping at Yeonjun’s cheek, trying to turn the older boy’s face away from his. He looks over to the two maknaes, just in time to see Taehyun rolling his eyes. </p><p>“Okay, just…be ready,” Hueningkai explains. The two of them disappear, closing the door with a click. </p><p>Beomgyu looks back at Yeonjun to find the older boy is still staring at him. He frowns and shoves Yeonjun’s chest with a scowl. “Okay! Let’s go!” Beomgyu grumbles. </p><p>Yeonjun just laughs and slips out of his bed, tugging on a hoodie. Beomgyu’s stomach lurches, but he chooses to ignore it this time. </p><p><b>five.</b> </p><p>Beomgyu might have finally figured it out. After weeks of mulling it over, he might possibly (possibly! Not 100% confirmed!) have feelings for Yeonjun. Or maybe not. But what he does know is that the best thing he can do now is tell Yeonjun how he feels so it’s not even more awkward between them. Beomgyu values good communication skills. </p><p>But he’s surprised that right now, as he’s delirious and making his way to Yeonjun’s room, his brain is telling him to confess. It’s not even that late, but Beomgyu stupidly took a nap in the afternoon, and after blearily waking up from it, he now can’t settle down. He missed out on eating dinner with Soobin and is now wandering over to Yeonjun’s room to see what the older boy is doing. </p><p>He knocks softly on the door and opens it to a smiling Yeonjun. Beomgyu laughs at the sight of him. Yeonjun is slumped over, an opened bag of shrimp chips to his right, his phone impossibly close to his face, and he’s shoved a headband on, but his hair is everywhere. </p><p>“Hyung…I need some emotional support,” Beomgyu says dramatically, flopping onto Yeonjun’s bed. The elder boy rolls his eyes, but he clicks off his phone, focusing his attention on Beomgyu. Beomgyu rolls over and sits on his knees beside Yeonjun, reaching out to adjust the older boy’s hair. </p><p>Beomgyu stifles a laugh as Yeonjun looks at him quizzically. Beomgyu gently threads through the strands of Yeonjun’s hair that are sticking completely upright to parting them in a semi-organized way and tucking them under his fuzzy headband. </p><p>“Is fixing my hair helping you emotionally?” Yeonjun asks, narrowing his eyes at Beomgyu. </p><p>“No, but it’s nice,” Beomgyu says quietly. </p><p>Yeonjun huffs out a laugh and pulls Beomgyu into a hug, much to the younger boy’s surprise. They’re both silent, Beomgyu more out of shock than anything. He buries his face into Yeonjun’s shoulder, holding him tight.</p><p>“Hey BG?” Yeonjun asks quietly, his voice low. Beomgyu hums in response, his eyes squeezed shut.</p><p>“What’s up, hmm? What’s wrong?” </p><p>Beomgyu wants to cry. A lump has formed in his throat, and he swallows hard, unsure how to answer Yeonjun’s question. Yeonjun’s question, which he posed to Beomgyu in the comfort of a giant hug because he cares <i>so much</i> about his members. And how Beomgyu just wants to burst into tears at the sheer amount of love Yeonjun has for them. </p><p>Yeonjun’s hands travel to Beomgyu’s chest to lightly push him away, then they move up Beomgyu’s frame to hold both of Beomgyu’s cheeks, squishing them lightly. Beomgyu smiles at him, making Yeonjun laugh, but it sorts of also comes out like a sob, and Yeonjun’s face falls as he continues to look into Beomgyu’s eyes. Suddenly Beomgyu realizes Yeonjun is really worried. And he’s worried about him. </p><p>Beomgyu tries to speak, but his mouth is so mushed thanks to Yeonjun’s hands he has to nudge the older boy to let go of his face before he can speak. Yeonjun laughs and moves his hands down to the base of Beomgyu’s neck, holding onto his shoulders. Yeonjun starts thumbing slowly over the hem of Beomgyu’s t-shirt. </p><p>“I’m okay,” Beomgyu whispers, sending Yeonjun a look. </p><p>“You don’t have to worry about me hyung.” And the confession is on the tip of his tongue; he’s ready to just push himself over the edge and say it. I like you. <i>I like you I like you I like you.</i> Except there’s also a part of him that thinks maybe this isn’t the right moment.</p><p>“But…?” Yeonjun prompts, ducking his head closer to Beomgyu, as the younger boy turned his head, breaking their eye contact.</p><p>“But,” Beomgyu breaths out then pauses. How can Yeonjun sense everything? How can he read him so perfectly? Beomgyu’s holding his breath, and it looks like Yeonjun may be too. </p><p>“But I like you.” </p><p>A silence stretches out between the two of them. But it isn’t an awkward silence. From the look on Yeonjun’s face, it’s more of a moment of realization. And there’s no questioning, no follow-up question, because Yeonjun just gets it. He gets him. </p><p>“Okay,” Yeonjun says finally, before pulling Beomgyu into another tight hug. Except this one is different. It’s like he’s clinging onto Beomgyu for dear life, and now Beomgyu is sure he’s shedding a few tears. </p><p>“Okay, thank you for telling me,” Yeonjun said quietly. His tone is so neutral that Beomgyu doesn’t know how he feels, but he doesn’t think it’s bad. He knows Yeonjun is just taking time to process, time to think this over. And yes, this could be super embarrassing if the feelings aren’t mutual, but Beomgyu knows he’ll eventually get over it. He’s good at stuff like that. And who knows, maybe now isn’t their time. There’s always the future. They’re going to be together for a while. </p><p>“Is that all you’re going to say?” Beomgyu scoffs, muffled from Yeonjun’s hoodie against his mouth. </p><p>“Yah!” Yeonjun smacks Beomgyu on the back lightly. “I’m thinking. Hold on.” </p><p>Beomgyu smiles to himself against Yeonjun’s shoulder. So this isn’t the worst reaction from Yeonjun. There definitely could have been worse ones. </p><p>“You can have a few days to think about it. About this. No pressure,” Beomgyu explains softly. He feels Yeonjun nod against him. When going over this scene in his head, this is not at all how he’d thought it would go. Yeonjun’s a very loud, a very expressive person, but right now, watching him, Yeonjun’s never seen him so serene. So calculated and concentrated. He likes that Yeonjun is putting so much thought into him. </p><p>“Okay, thank you,” Yeonjun whispers. Beomgyu has no idea why they’re whispering, but he doesn’t mind it. </p><p>“Okay now can I lie on you?” Yeonjun asks suddenly. </p><p>“Why would you need to do that?” Beomgyu shoots back immediately, confused.</p><p>“It’s going to help me think,” Yeonjun says innocently. Beomgyu bursts into a string of giggles, shoving Yeonjun back, breaking apart their hug. </p><p>“Hyunggg, I’m gonna get all stuffy,” Beomgyu whines, tilting his head to the side and closing his eyes.</p><p>“No, no, I promise it’ll be good,” Yeonjun says, laughing, pulling at Beomgyu’s wrist, silently asking the younger boy to get moving into position. Beomgyu opens his eyes to find Yeonjun looking at him with such a fond smile on his face he thinks his heart is about to burst.</p><p>Beomgyu pulls his legs out from under him and swivels until he’s lying down and under one of Yeonjun’s blankets, his head propped up on a plushie. </p><p>Yeonjun snuggles up to Beomgyu almost immediately, pushing his hands under Beomgyu’s torso and interlinking them between the mattress and Beomgyu’s back. Beomgyu’s now trapped in Yeonjun’s hold and knows he won’t be going anywhere for a while. He doesn’t mind, though; he originally came here for some sleep, and he has no doubt he’ll dose off soon enough in this position. </p><p>“Promise me one thing,” Yeonjun suddenly says, his head against Beomgyu’s stomach. “Whatever happens, you still come sleep with me, okay?” </p><p>“Hyung,” Beomgyu’s voice is slightly hollow. “I will <i>never</i> stop coming to you unless you tell me not to. You’re the only one.” </p><p>“The only one who what?”</p><p>“Who can put up with me.” Beomgyu smiles, but Yeonjun’s gone still, and Beomgyu’s suddenly scared that was the wrong thing to say. </p><p>Yeonjun sits up, pulling his arms out from around Beomgyu and leans in towards Beomgyu. “Thank you,” he whispers. </p><p>His eyes are wide, and Beomgyu’s mouth drops open in surprise at their sudden proximity. He feels like Yeonjun is trying to figure him out at this moment. Like he’s trying to look into Beomgyu’s brain and read all his thoughts and feelings. </p><p>Yeonjun tilts his head and kisses Beomgyu’s neck. It’s soft and sincere, and Beomgyu’s stomach does the oh so familiar lurch which he now knows the reason for, and he stupidly lets out a small laugh.</p><p>“BG!” Yeonjun slaps Beomgyu’s shoulder playfully, “Be serious! Thank you for putting up with me too!”</p><p>“YJ!” Beomgyu responds, in the same tone of voice Yeonjun was using. “You’re welcome!” </p><p>They’re both laughing, but Beomgyu stops once he makes eye contact with Yeonjun again and sees the confusion in the other boy’s eyes. He still looks a little lost or just in need of some advice. </p><p>“<i>Don’t worry</i>,” Beomgyu reassures him again, bending forward, so they’re centimetres apart. “Take your time hyung. I’m serious. I’ll be right here waiting. No pressure, okay? If you feel the same way, that’s great, we can work from there, and if not, that’s completely fine.” He looks at Yeonjun with a crooked smile. </p><p>“<i>Like an echo in the forest, haruga doraogetji, amu ildo eopdan deusi, yeah, life goes on</i>,” Beomgyu sings, swaying back and forth. Yeonjun bursts out laughing, placing a hand over Beomgyu’s mouth to stop him from continuing the song. </p><p>“Yaaaah, don’t embarrass me,” Yeonjun grumbles, huffing out a laugh. </p><p>“Hyung, I’m dealing with the pain of your possible rejection. Let me handle this in my own way,” Beomgyu says, trying to sound as dramatic as possible. Yeonjun rolls his eyes and replaces his arm beside Beomgyu. </p><p>“As of right now, I don’t think it’s going to be a rejection,” Yeonjun pauses when Beomgyu’s mouth shapes into an ‘o’ from surprise, “<i>But</i> I still need a couple days to think about this.” Now he’s the one avoiding eye contact with Beomgyu, and the younger boy feels giddy.</p><p>“Aww hyung.” He reaches over and pinches Yeonjun’s cheeks, laughing. </p><p>“Okay, okay, okay!” Yeonjun complains, moving his face side to side rapidly, trying to shake off Beomgyu’s fingers. “Bedtime?” he prompts, looking at Beomgyu with wide eyes.</p><p>“Yes please,” Beomgyu replies happily. Yeonjun asks him if he wants to get changed, but Beomgyu came prepared, already wearing a sweat set, has done his skincare routine and brushed his teeth. Yeonjun, on the other hand, has to get ready and leaves Beomgyu in his bed for twenty minutes. It’s twenty minutes of Beomgyu lying flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling in shock, replaying every second of their conversation. </p><p>He did it. He confessed, and it hadn’t gone terribly, and actually, it went pretty well. Beomgyu’s heart swells at the thought of the feelings being mutual but reminds himself not to get carried away and that he should wait until Yeonjun talks with him before he lets his mind wander. </p><p>Yeonjun returns, looking incredibly sleepy, and Beomgyu just wants to wrap him up in another big hug and stay like that forever. Yeonjun’s hair has returned to a somewhat spiky mess, and Beomgyu reaches out to fix it as soon as Yeonjun slides under the covers beside him. </p><p>Yeonjun grumbles and tries to skirt away from Beomgyu’s hands, but he gives in once he realizes Beomgyu isn’t going to give up until he’s fixed his hyung’s hair. </p><p>Yeonjun clicks off his bedside light and plugs in his phone, and then the two boys are alone, silent and still in the dark room. </p><p>“How come you like me?” Yeonjun asks, his voice filling up the whole bedroom. </p><p>Beomgyu’s only quiet for a moment. “Because I feel like I can be my complete entire self when I’m with you.” </p><p>“That’s really nice.”</p><p>“Yeah. It really is, hyung.” </p><p>“I’m glad you’re here, Gyu. And not just now, I mean, that <i>this</i> is normal for us.” </p><p>Beomgyu hums in response, snuggling up to Yeonjun. He’s now actually getting tired, but he thinks he’s just crashing from the extreme adrenaline rush he experienced from confessing his feelings to Yeonjun. </p><p>They settle into each other so comfortably, and just as Beomgyu is falling asleep, he feels Yeonjun place a soft kiss on the top of his head. He smiles to himself and tugs at Yeonjun’s t-shirt, bringing him closer. </p><p>Maybe, everything will be okay.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i was trying to finish this in time for beomgyu's bday :// anyways that didn't work out bc once again this got to be way longer than i thought it was going to be</p><p>hope you enjoyed !!!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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